The A to Z of cheating in sport

How do you employ 'the face clutch'? Why would you borrow urine? And what is the best use for Vaseline? From grunting and gouging to Balco and Epo, OSM uncovers sport's most shameful secrets

Diego Maradona of Argentina handles the ball past Peter Shilton of England to score the opening goal of the World Cup Quarter Final at the Azteca Stadium in Mexico City, Mexico. Photograph: Bongarts/Getty Images

autobiographical immunity n mistaken assumption that intentional rule-breaking revealed in memoirs somehow doesn't count. Matt Le Tissier's recollection that he once punted a ball out of bounds with his first kick of a match to win a £10,000 bet prompted a police probe (quickly dropped), while Roy Keane was fined £150,000 by the FA when he described deliberately crunching the knee of Alfe-Inge Haaland ("'I fucking hit him hard…Take that, you cunt").
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